Long winded... apology in advance.

I don’t want to only blog when I have something to whine about, but it seems fitting today. First off, the transition with Lucy at day care and me at work full time seemed to be going fairly well for the first week. Lucy loves to play with the other kids and seems to really like Sally, the owner. She doesn’t cry when I drop her off, she’s very easy to hand over. The first day, I thought I might cry, but I didn’t. Adam picks her up at the end of the day and rarely does he have anything important to report. She’s napping there just fine.

She does have a cold unfortunately. That has complicated the transition a little—especially for her and I at night. We’re up at least every hour, sometimes every half hour. I found out last night however, that she sleeps better with me lying next to her (we moved to the couch) and then we are both able to get some sleep. Last night, at 1:30, approximately the 6^th time I awoke with her, I got so frustrated I yelled “what do you want me to do?!” I wonder what Adam thought about that. I proceeded to thrash around the house, grab some blankets and my pillow, throw the blinds shut in the living room, tell the whining dog to shut up and plop Lucy and myself down on the couch to try and get some, any sleep. From there we slept relatively fine until 5 when Adam needed to get ready for work and then we moved to the bedroom. The series of events that followed that morning seem petty and insignificant individually. But collectively, they made me incredibly grumpy.

Poor Lucy was so tired once we woke up, she had a little bit of a bottle and then wanted to doze on my shoulder. As she was dozing, she went potty in an already saturated diaper. It leaked all over me. I knew I didn’t have time to give her a bath so I wiped her down really good with wipes. I was able to give her some food in her high chair and turn on Sesame Street so I would get a shower and once my hair was done and I was all dressed, Bear was dancing around the living room to go out. I acknowledged him and let him know I need to put on Lucy’s sweater, my jacket and some shoes. Well, he couldn’t wait and decided to wet on one of our couch cushions which was on the floor (because I had slept on the couch). I was so furious with him that once I did get him on the lease and outside, I yanked him around so much out of frustration that I was sure someone would see and call PETA on me.

Because Lucy doesn’t feel good, she doesn’t want to go and play with her toys by herself like she usually does. She’s normally so independent and cruises around the house exploring, but when she’s sick, she just wants to be held—but not to snuggle—just to sit there and try and get at whatever I’m doing. It really hard to comfort her when she’s so congested. (Keep in mind, this is simply a congestion illness—no green snot, no tugging on the ear; if it were that bad, I would be staying home with her and would never let her go to day care and risk getting the other kids sick).

Finally I’m ready to head out the door and I put Lucy in her car seat and she just yells at me angrily. I can’t tell if that’s because she knows she’s going to day care, or just because she doesn’t want to be in it… I just couldn’t tell, but it frustrated me even more because it made me feel like I was making her do something she didn’t want to do and because I knew she didn’t feel good and she just needed a day home with mom which is something I couldn’t provide today. Sigh.

By the time we got to day care, she was happy and the delivery went smoothly. Sally is so great and I’m so glad I found her. Her accent is charming and she always asks me how my new job is going. I was still grumpy at this point, but I’m not one to really reflect it too much onto other people, at least I like to think that I don’t. Oh! I forgot to mention that I ran out of milk, so I didn’t get my morning coffee (and I don’t always have it and I don’t think it’s something I necessarily need every day, but today would have liked to have it). So I left Sally’s and drove over to Thunder Joe’s to get a coffee. I let the lady making coffee know I was grumpy and I needed something with an extra shot and not something too sweet. I left with the perfect white chocolate mocha and feeling a little better. My funk finally disappeared at about 10 am and I’m feeling better.

I love my job. It’s pretty much the same stuff I was doing in Eureka, but for more people and less pay. I started at the same pay rate I started at in Eureka, which is $2 less than what I ended at in Eureka,, but I’m sure I’ll prove my worth very quickly here and hopefully it’ll go up.

It’s 10:36 now and I’m in a much better mood. I need to get to working though. :)