Long winded... apology in advance.

I don’t want to only blog when I have something to whine about, but it seems fitting today. First off, the transition with Lucy at day care and me at work full time seemed to be going fairly well for the first week. Lucy loves to play with the other kids and seems to really like Sally, the owner. She doesn’t cry when I drop her off, she’s very easy to hand over. The first day, I thought I might cry, but I didn’t. Adam picks her up at the end of the day and rarely does he have anything important to report. She’s napping there just fine.

She does have a cold unfortunately. That has complicated the transition a little—especially for her and I at night. We’re up at least every hour, sometimes every half hour. I found out last night however, that she sleeps better with me lying next to her (we moved to the couch) and then we are both able to get some sleep. Last night, at 1:30, approximately the 6^th time I awoke with her, I got so frustrated I yelled “what do you want me to do?!” I wonder what Adam thought about that. I proceeded to thrash around the house, grab some blankets and my pillow, throw the blinds shut in the living room, tell the whining dog to shut up and plop Lucy and myself down on the couch to try and get some, any sleep. From there we slept relatively fine until 5 when Adam needed to get ready for work and then we moved to the bedroom. The series of events that followed that morning seem petty and insignificant individually. But collectively, they made me incredibly grumpy.

Poor Lucy was so tired once we woke up, she had a little bit of a bottle and then wanted to doze on my shoulder. As she was dozing, she went potty in an already saturated diaper. It leaked all over me. I knew I didn’t have time to give her a bath so I wiped her down really good with wipes. I was able to give her some food in her high chair and turn on Sesame Street so I would get a shower and once my hair was done and I was all dressed, Bear was dancing around the living room to go out. I acknowledged him and let him know I need to put on Lucy’s sweater, my jacket and some shoes. Well, he couldn’t wait and decided to wet on one of our couch cushions which was on the floor (because I had slept on the couch). I was so furious with him that once I did get him on the lease and outside, I yanked him around so much out of frustration that I was sure someone would see and call PETA on me.

Because Lucy doesn’t feel good, she doesn’t want to go and play with her toys by herself like she usually does. She’s normally so independent and cruises around the house exploring, but when she’s sick, she just wants to be held—but not to snuggle—just to sit there and try and get at whatever I’m doing. It really hard to comfort her when she’s so congested. (Keep in mind, this is simply a congestion illness—no green snot, no tugging on the ear; if it were that bad, I would be staying home with her and would never let her go to day care and risk getting the other kids sick).

Finally I’m ready to head out the door and I put Lucy in her car seat and she just yells at me angrily. I can’t tell if that’s because she knows she’s going to day care, or just because she doesn’t want to be in it… I just couldn’t tell, but it frustrated me even more because it made me feel like I was making her do something she didn’t want to do and because I knew she didn’t feel good and she just needed a day home with mom which is something I couldn’t provide today. Sigh.

By the time we got to day care, she was happy and the delivery went smoothly. Sally is so great and I’m so glad I found her. Her accent is charming and she always asks me how my new job is going. I was still grumpy at this point, but I’m not one to really reflect it too much onto other people, at least I like to think that I don’t. Oh! I forgot to mention that I ran out of milk, so I didn’t get my morning coffee (and I don’t always have it and I don’t think it’s something I necessarily need every day, but today would have liked to have it). So I left Sally’s and drove over to Thunder Joe’s to get a coffee. I let the lady making coffee know I was grumpy and I needed something with an extra shot and not something too sweet. I left with the perfect white chocolate mocha and feeling a little better. My funk finally disappeared at about 10 am and I’m feeling better.

I love my job. It’s pretty much the same stuff I was doing in Eureka, but for more people and less pay. I started at the same pay rate I started at in Eureka, which is $2 less than what I ended at in Eureka,, but I’m sure I’ll prove my worth very quickly here and hopefully it’ll go up.

It’s 10:36 now and I’m in a much better mood. I need to get to working though. :)

More changes for the Lefebvres

Yesterday I was finally offered the job I was waiting for at Susanville Real Estate. I'm going to take over the receptionist position with the intent of boosting their marketing. Marketing is my "expertise" and the way I justify "wasting" 4 years getting an art degree (I say wasting only because there's not much else you can do with art, and I'd like to think that I'm NOT wasting it by using it in marketing). Downside is, Lucy will have to go to daycare. This was an incredibly difficult and heart breaking decision. I don't doubt if I face much ridicule from other mothers at the fact that she is my child and I should be the one raising her. Adam and I truly feel that this is the best decision for our family so that we can appropriately provide for Lucy and our future children.

Surprise, I start today although Lucy is with me. My mom is coming to town tomorrow to watch her for a few hours and all day Friday. Monday she'll start in day care granted I can find one that we like and is in our price range.

This whole process has been exhausting. But I'm looking on the bright side and trying to find a positive. Adam will have Lucy on Fridays (if he doesn't have overtime), and we'll prioritize evenings and weekend fun. I wake up early with Lucy so that we'll have mommy-daughter time before she goes to day care. I keep telling myself that everything will be ok and she'll still recognize me as her mommy.

Newest photos of Lucy

Life in Susanville

Things are good here in Susanville. Adam is still waiting to hear if he's a permanent employee with USFS. I'm getting a new job, but it's status is on the DL and I don't know when I get to start (doesn't that just leave you on the edge of your seat?). I'm totally addicted to FarmVille in Facebook. Pathetic, I know. We had a fabulous surprise visit from my sister and her new hubby Joe, and we'll have more visitors this weekend.

Lucy is now eating whole apples and more clearly saying "All Done," which she's yelling at me at this very moment. She is sleeping better throught the night lately but I've broken one of my cardinal rules out of desperation: I'm putting her to bed with a bottle, and giving her one in the middle of the night instead of getting her out to eat. Although all the baby books warn against this, it has worked well for us. She's not waking completely up by me reaching in and getting her our of her crib and she's only asking to eat about once now instead of 2-4 times. This is a habit I will eventually have to break, but it's a "better" "worse habit" than her still sleeping in our bed or something.

Anywho... I've decided I'm going to go short with my hair again. I thought I wanted to grow it out, but I just end up wearing it in a pony tail and I HATE that. So, off it goes! Just waiting for another paycheck to go down to the salon.

The Jacksons are coming over tomorrow night and that should be fun. We laugh pretty well with them and it's fun getting to know Jessica away from our big group of friends.

That's all for tonight! Thanks for reading...

Our Lord's Land Trip

For about 6 months now, we've been planning this family trip to the Lord's Land near Mendocino and made plans to go with 3 other families. On Friday we headed down with Ryan and Lyndsey Bryson, and Seth, Lynae, James, and Josiah Condit. Saturday we were joined by Logan, Robin, and Cason Wilson. We had a good time--the weather was better than we could have asked for. Amazingly, we all crammed into one cabin--All 8 of us adults and our 4 kids! We alternated with meals; the Brysons cooked AMAZING enchiladas for us the first night, the Condits made some tasty eggs, bacon, and veggies for us the first morning, I cooked boring spaghetti the 2nd night, and the Wilsons made egg and ham "muffins" or last morning together. On Saturday, we met up with the Wilsons in Mendocino and went on a 5 mile hike to the Pygmy Forest at Jug Handle. It was a great hike and needless to say I was quite sore the next day. Oddly enough, I only took one photo the whole trip. It's a silly one too: I don't know why Robin and Logan's mouths are open.
This photo was taken by Lynae and it's of Lucy eating pretzels on the beach.

Adam's SF Trip

For Adam's birthday (April 1, no joke) my parents gave Adam 2 tickets to a Giants game of his choice. He decided on the September 12 game and decided to take my dad. The two had really great seats (just 26 rows up from the Giants' dugout) and had good time. Unfortunately, Lincecum wasn't pitching and the Giants lost to the Dodgers. None the less, fun was had by all.

Lucy's Standing

For a few weeks now, Lucy's been pulling herself up on furniture and walking along the edge of it. It's so cute... and she know's it. We love when she turns around and gives us that grin as if to say, "Look what I can do!"